There’s nothing like a crisis to get you clear on who you are, and sometimes, and more importantly , who you are not . I was recently confronted with a professional crisis , and had it occurred earlier on in my journey , I might not have handled it the way that I did . I’m hoping to share some of these insights.
I won’t go into the details of the crisis per se, but I will say this … It was something that I thought would never happen to me, it was sudden, and it threatened my livelihood. Now, just because I was not the one at fault, does not mean I felt any better or relief about the fact that it was happening to me , and there was nothing I could do to immediately stop it .
Don’t get me wrong, my usual pattern of thinking is not this Zen-level headed-ness. I often hear various professionals espouse the virtues of detachment , as if it were some unattainable goal. Often times, I feel the word itself ( detachment ) gets a bad rap, as most associate it with an individual who is cold, calculated, and even emotionless.
For whatever reason, when I heard the words that could have sent me into crisis mode, I had the clarity to hear above all of it ;
“You can do better, you must do better, you will do better , and be better “…. In the midst of my crisis , I imagined Yoda saying these words to me , as he spoke so clearly to Luke Skywalker in the forests of Dagobah. I allowed the image of these words to impact me on a deep level , and asked myself what the point was in freaking out about it anyways . It wasn’t as if I could do anything about it, at least not immediately .
I realized ,that if there wasn’t anything I could do about it in the immediate, then why stress about it in the immediate? I think this gave me the “permission”, to problem solve the situation in a more constructive and logical way, versus an emotional reaction to the crisis . Because I was able to step back , and think of it critically , I was able to solve the problem with less emotion, less reaction and more control.
I know it probably sounds counterintuitive to “step back”, from an emotional reaction, especially when you are caught up in it , however, it really does make a difference in the long run . This is the true meaning of detachment. It means to slow your mind down long enough to realize you are getting caught up in something that might just sweep you away, unless you learn to stop and focus .
The more you engage in a particular emotion, the further justified you feel in feeling that emotion , so for example, if I had reacted the way I initially wanted to , which would be to go into “freak out mode”, this likely would have only served to have created more obstacles for me in the long run . Because I was able to immediately recognize it for what it was , with a little insight , I was able to avoid it altogether .
Amidst every crisis we have in life, lies underneath , an opportunity , or invitation, perhaps to look at things differently, or to do then differently
